Childhood fears you (probably) grew out of

Your weekly dose of midication

Were you an anxious child? Did you compulsively collect scratch ‘n sniff stickers but absolutely never, ever opened the packaging? Do you remember when you couldn’t sleep with your feet over the bed because the night monsters would gobble them clean off? Thankfully you are so grown-up now that you can almost dangle a leg out during a heatwave and, anyway, your zero fucks era tells you that the demons might as well just carry you off at this point. Here are some other things you used to think would be included in your long list of life’s most serious problems…